


No Matter Where I Turn it All Sounds the Same

by ravenhairedtrickster



Category: The Avengers, Thor - Fandom
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-06-13
Updated: 2012-06-12
Packaged: 2017-11-07 15:14:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,681
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/432547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ravenhairedtrickster/pseuds/ravenhairedtrickster
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Summary: Loki is a deaf teacher, he has no kids and lives alone. Thor is anything but alone, he's the life of the party and a popular fitness trainer, he's constantly surrounded by women. Both their lives get turned inside out when Loki hits Thor with his car. Suddenly things get complicated and Loki realizes he's attracted the attention of a man he couldn't possibly love. Or could he?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> a/n: I've had this idea in my head for a while. Not sure where it will go, if anywhere.

He's not entirely late, but close to it. The clock ticks loudly from the wall, but he doesn't mind it as he wraps an emerald scarf around his neck, he doesn't hear it. From the kitchen the toaster dings, he slides his shoes on before pulling the toast from it, dropping it onto the counter and buttering it with swift strokes of the knife. It's all routine, simply knowing when things are done without the tell-tale sounds to alert him. Loki leads a quiet life, literally. Having lost his hearing nine years ago he's had to cope with the never ending silence. At first it seemed like an impossible task, maddening even, but as time went on he adapted to the loss, thriving despite the disability.

The clock keeps ticking and he turns, glaring at it, scowling some. Brushing a strand of raven hair away from his face he gathers his things, marked work, lesson plans, toast and heads for the door. Shutting it behind him he unlocks his car and sets his things down in the passenger seat. The car starts smoothly when he turns the key and it can feel it hum beneath him, no grinding or shuddering. Drawing the seatbelt across his chest he leans back and sighs, glancing at the clock. 8:58am stares back at him. He's definitely late. Putting the car into reverse he backs out of the driveway. For a second, just a fraction of a moment, he looks at the ugly house before him. He's renting it, cheap rent, one bedroom, pretty scummy, an apartment would probably be nicer but he doesn't mind. It's closer to the school and it's his own space, not like in an apartment where you could very well have people on all sides.

He looks at his rearview mirror, there's a flash of blonde and his car jerks as he hits something. He slams on the breaks, his heart pounding as he puts it into park and throws open his door. The world is eternally quiet for him but he can feel his pulse racing a for a second he remembers what it felt like to hear that sound, insistent thump in his ears, loud and unruly. He runs to the back of the car. He's hit a man, brawny, tall, long blonde hair.

"I'm so sorry- I, well - I didn't see you," he says in a rush, the man looks up at him and Loki flushes, embarrassed and unsure whether he had been yelling. He hopes not.

"It's okay," the man says and he keeps talking but his head turns, hair falling over his face as he picks himself off the ground, his words are lost to Loki. When finally his face reappears Loki catches the end word, "- okay?"

He shifts his weight, wrapping his arms around himself, he looks away then focuses back on the man.

"I'm sorry," he says, now he knows his voice is soft, perhaps too soft, "I can't _hear_ you when you aren't facing me." The man stares at him, not registering what he's just said. "I'm deaf." He provides. "I lip read."

He's expected pity from the man, they always pity him, but instead the blonde breaks out into a big smile. "Oh, I'm sorry," he says, "I said you should be more careful next time, watch where you're going, okay?"

Loki nods in return then steps forward, reaching out to press slim fingers to the mans shoulder. "You aren't hurt are you, oh God," he breathes, "I'm so sorry, I'm late as it is, I wasn't paying attention, I just - this has never happened before.." He trails off pathetically, removing his hand from the mans shoulder. He steps back, stealing a glance at the clock in the car. His stomach clenches at the time. He's twenty minutes late. He sighs and looks to the blonde.

"Do you have a cell phone?" He asks. He needs to call and tell them he won't be in today, he's rattled.

"I do," comes the reply.

"Could I use it, I mean, could you call someone for me?" Being deaf and all, since he lost his hearing he's never owned a phone, not even those special ones that type out the conversation. Those types of luxuries are just too expensive and his income just enough for him to live off of.

"Of course, number?" Loki recites the number and the man phones. "What should I tell them?"

"The truth," he sighs, "I hit you, you're calling on my behalf, I won't be in today and I'm deeply sorry."

The man nods and relays the information to the lady on the other end. There are a few questions but soon enough the man is ending the call.

"There, all taken care of," he says another smile gracing his face. Loki tries to smile in return but it's more of a grimace, if the man notices he doesn't mention it. "So, you're name?" He asks suddenly.

"Loki," he murmurs and doesn't ask for the strangers name but is given it anyway.

"Beautiful," the man says, "my name is Thor."

Loki tries not to be entirely put off by Thor's comment, beautiful, but he manages a smile.

"Would you," Thor starts and turns his head, glancing at the road then turns back, "- dinner with me?"

Loki shifts, his fingers toying with the green scarf around his neck. "I'm sorry, you turned, I couldn't hear you, could you repeat yourself?"

Thor blinks, "Sorry, I forgot. I asked if maybe you would like to have dinner with me, maybe tonight. I feel bad, having ruined your day."

Loki stares at him. Shocked. Confused. He blinks, looks away then looks back. He bites his lip. "I - _uh_ \- I'm not -"

"Come on, you've got nothing to do, a whole day off," Thor says, "besides, I'd like to get to know the man who hit me."

Loki feels his heat heat in what is a extremely inappropriate reaction to Thor's words. He tucks a strand of raven hair behind his ear and shrugs. He feels trapped but this Thor is friendly, offering dinner when Loki is the one who hit him. Under the blondes intense blue gaze he caves.

"Alright," he says quietly.

"Good!" Thor's voice booms, or Loki is sure it does.


	2. Chapter 2

Loki spent the day marking, writing up lesson plans for the next term and simply dreading six o'clock. No matter what he did he kept glancing at the clock, shooting it scowling looks and annoyed glares. Last time he checked he had just over half an hour before he was meeting Thor at a near by steak house. He had set aside his marking and lessons in favour of getting ready. He didn't want to go, he really didn't, but Thor had been so kind, calling the school and all. Not pressing charges for being hit. He sighed as he stripped down, folding his clothes neatly, and stepped into the shower. The water was soothing, warm and inviting. Loki shut his eyes as he ducked his head under the stream of water. A shiver traveled down his back as tendrils of liquid heat massaged his scalp.

Stepping out from under the shower head he began the process of massaging shampoo through his dark hair, once or twice suds threatening to slide down his brow and into his eyes. Each time he wiped them away and continued before rinsing the shampoo out. He quickly washed the rest of his body, shut the shower off, wrapped a towel around himself and stepped out. He dried as fast as he could, shivering in the drastically colder air of the bathroom. He chose something simple, not fancy, not too undone. Dark pants, a jade button up shirt and over that a black jacket, all of it complimented and oddly held together by a gold chain he secured around his neck.

He brushed his hair hurriedly, allowing a few strands to hang over his face before leaving. This time around he was extra careful while backing out of the driveway. The drive was solemn, at the last intersection Loki shifted in his seat, his palms sweaty against the steering wheel. Calm down, he told himself, it's just dinner nothing else. A part of him hoped Thor wouldn't show up, forgotten, changed his mind even. But it wasn't to be because as Loki parked and got out of his car he saw familiar blonde hair, broad shoulders and large smile walking towards him.

"You came!" Thor exclaimed and before Loki could protest wrapped his thick arms around him, squeezing the air out of his lungs in what Loki thought to be a little too much contact hug. Thor continued to speak and when he let Loki go the raven haired man only caught bits and pieces. Thor looked at him expectantly when he finished.

"Your face," Loki said with a sigh. How many times would he need to tell this man. "I couldn't see it."

Thor's face changed as he offered a small smile. "I seem to keep forgetting," he said, "forgive me. I asked if you'd like to sit in the bar area or restaurant."

Loki shifted his weight, truthfully he wanted neither but he was the one being invited so he shrugged. "It's up to you." He murmured and watched Thor beam.

"The bar then," he said, a large hand gripping Loki's wrist. "Come along, we will dine and drink - " his head turned and Loki lost the rest, everything falling into silence as Thor led him inside.

The smell of steak was heavy in the air, a hickory sort of scent and Loki breathed in deeply, swallowing thickly as his stomach rumbled. He hadn't noticed how hungry he had gotten. Thor brought him to a small table, just enough room for two, and released his wrist. Loki took his seat carefully, mindful not to scrap any of the legs against the floor. He doubted it mattered, it was probably loud in here anyway. Settled and opening the menu Loki glanced across at Thor. He caught the blonde mans eye and Thor looked up at him, Loki could see his jaw moving and - he flushed, suddenly realizing something - he couldn't hear Thor. The lighting was too dim for his eyes, he could tell Thor was speaking but he couldn't read the lip movements as they were partly in shadows. He narrowed his eyes, straining to see, no use. Thor had finished, his eyebrow raised as he stared at the raven haired man.

"Loki?" He asked, "are you okay?" He addressed the vacant expression on the pale face before him.

Loki brought a hand to his eyes, rubbing tiredly. He shook his head.

Thor blinked, putting two and two together. Taking out his phone he typed before passing the device to the other man. Loki took the phone with careful fingers, turning it so he could look at the glowing screen.

_You can't hear me._

He stared tiredly down at it. "Yes," he said, voice probably too quiet in the possible cacophony of the bar. "It's too dark."

He felt bad admitting it, and a tad bit embarrassed. Loki had never regarded himself as disabled but the reality was entirely different. He glanced at Thor who was speaking to a waiter, when the women shook her head he stood. Loki didn't have time to question before Thor grasped his wrist against, tugging him gently from his seat.

Thor was speaking again, he could feel it in the subtle vibrations, the twitch of the man's jaw, the part that Loki could see at least. Thor led them outside. He turned.

"I'm sorry," he said, a smile on his face, trying to make the best of the situation, "I should've thought it through. I asked for a table in the regular restaurant but they're booked."

Loki shrugged, "It doesn't matter," he murmured, "I have things I should be doing -"

"No," Thor interrupted, "no, I promised you dinner... Maybe you'd like take-out, my place?"

The words died on Loki's lips. He shifted uncomfortably and severed all visual contact by staring down at his feet for a few seconds. He gathered his thoughts, he didn't know the man before him beyond a name and looks. Besides, Loki had been taught to be cautious, overly so at times. A hand enclosed around his shoulder and Loki's head snapped up.

"Well?" Thor asked, his eyes, from what Loki could see, held nothing but the naked question. He swallowed thickly and nodded.

"Alright."

Thor beamed, his smile growing three times the size Loki had seen it before. It coaxed a smile from him and with reluctance his lips quirked upwards.

"Did you drive?" Loki asked, glancing back at his car. Thor chuckled, a sound that Loki was sure would be pleasant, and shook his head.

"No, I decided to walk. I don't live far from here." He explained then asked, "Would chinese food be okay?"

"Chinese would be fine," he replied and Thor told him to 'hold on a sec' while he phoned the restaurant. He ordered the food, checked the time then hung up.

"They said about twenty minutes," he informed, gesturing towards Loki's car. "Ah, I missed it," he laughed as they walked over, patting the vehicle briefly. "My place is down the block and to the left."

Unlocking the car Loki nodded and slid into the drivers seat, Thor followed. They made there way to the blonde mans place and Loki parked carefully in the parking lot.

"You live in an apartment?" He asked, slightly surprised. By the looks of it the building was far nicer than his run down house, but still. How could Thor manage all the people living so close. He supposed he didn't need to know, besides, it wasn't like he would be visiting often. This was a one time thing, an accident because the restaurant had been too dark, and a sorry because despite Loki hitting Thor, the man was uncommonly kind.

"I do," Thor replied, turning to face him as they left the car. "Two bedrooms, all to myself."

Loki nodded slowly, then drifted back to follow Thor. He needed to retrieve his thoughts. He was just coming here to eat. He kept telling himself that, and it was true. He didn't know Thor but maybe he would get to know him. Loki had been raised to be careful, raised not to trust right away, yet Thor was so kind. He had only 'known' him for hours and Loki could already feel himself swaying in his decisions. Oh how ashamed his father would be. He bit his lip as he entered the apartment. It was rather spacious, and very simple. Thor had a couch, a TV, a chair incase he hosted more than one person.

"Make yourself at home," Thor said, looking at him. They parted there, Thor headed to the kitchen, Loki wandered to the couch, gracefully sitting down, crossing one leg over the other. Thor returned a second later with two, what appeared to be, beers. He offered Loki one, and although beer was far from his forte, Loki took it, offering a small smile, almost a grimace. Thor sat down beside him, the couch bouncing at the sudden - muscle, he was sure of it - weight descending upon it.

"I truly am sorry for this all," the blonde said, his face slightly turned, Loki caught only a few of the words, he shrugged in response, sipping at the beer the same time Thor gulped a mouthful down. Thor turned on the TV and Loki sat there stiffly, staring at the screen, not bothering to care that Thor had turned on the captains so he could read.

Somehow one beer turned to two and Loki was slouched on the couch, his mind a fuzzy frenzy of mismatched wires and things that couldn't possibly be, like the sounds he couldn't be hearing. He rarely had drank when he was younger and he always had been a lightweight. Now it was most evident as Thor came into his view, blue eyes searching his face, a hand on his suddenly clammy skin. He offered Thor a lazy smile.

"Another?" Loki asked, words slurred slightly, eye lids constantly falling to half mast. Thor's mouth was moving now, and there was a strange look on his face. Loki picked out certain words.

_Bed. Home. Keys?_

None of it made sense, he shifted onto his side, pressed his face into the warm hand still cradling his cheek and shut his eyes. The chinese food long forgotten.


	3. Chapter 3

He's so warm, coccooned in plush heat, an unfamiliar, though comforting, scent surrounding him. When Loki opens his eyes it takes him a moment to remember what happened. He recalls bits and pieces, hazy and speckled with black dots, shreds of memory hanging together only by spiderweb thread. He remembers alcohol, too much alcohol, asking questions and laughing giddily, Thor's face, concern lacing it as a gentle hand touched him. Next was only shattered fractions of things that had been, trying to stand, his knees weak, arms, not his own, weaving around him like two great white snakes. Hot skin beneath his face, his nose burying into... Loki's eyes stretch wide because something is moving beside him, pulling sheet and blanket from him, a hand that he hadn't noticed, sliding from his hip.

He scrambles up too fast, too soon and makes some noise of shock as the blood rushes to his head, equilibrium grossly off. He doesn't see Thor, and certainly doesn't hear him, as the man grabs him by the arm, a hand pressing to the small of his back. It's strange but when the blood stops pounding and Loki opens his eyes he finds his fingers digging into helping flesh, his free hand somehow finding Thor's shoulder. He glances up at the blonde and quickly lets go, the expression he wears is something Loki hasn't seen in years, not since his first, and last, highschool crush.

He turns his head.

"Thor," he murmurs, and pauses, unsure of what to say, unsure of what happened, but wanting to know. "Thor, I this... why were we in the same bed?"

He looks to the blonde and his jaw almost drops at Thor's reply, "I couldn't fit on the couch, of course." As simple as that and yet so complicated.

"Why wasn't I on the couch?"

"You're a guest," Thor said, shrugging and Loki just notices that Thor is only in boxers.

"And I am a stranger," he reasons, "we don't know each other, sleeping in the same bed is inappropriate." He says it like he means it, but it's only his inner teacher channeling out, it is inappropriate and Loki is horrified that he finds himself simply accepting it. Not minding it. Inviting it?

Thor laughs and Loki for a split second wishes he had left his hand on the others mans shoulder so he could feel it, a rumbling through a strong chest.

"It hardly matters," comes Thor's reply, "you were drunk and I was tired, we only shared a bed."

We only shared a bed. The words are loud in his mind, even if he can't hear them. Maybe he's over reacting, besides he doesn't feel like anything is out of order, other than the queasy feeling residing in his stomach. Most definitely the aftermath of the alcohol. He sighs and Thor releases his wrist, a precaution he had held onto literally in case Loki showed signs of falling again.

"Thank you," Loki murmurs, in this situation he doesn't know what to say. Thank you seems like the right words. Thor had taken care of him, even if not in the most professional way possible.

"Do you have the time?" Loki suddenly asks.

Thor glances at his phone. "Ten thirty-four." He replies and Loki panics.

"Oh God," he exclaims, sounding breathless, he looks wildly around the room, flushing after he realizes he isn't wearing his clothes. "My clothes!" He practical cries, turning to Thor. "I'm late," he sucks in a deep breath, but it seems the oxygen hardly goes to his brain because he continues to breath rapidly, hyperventilating. "The time, oh God, I'm going to be fired!"

Loki turns to run out of the room but suddenly there's hands on him, again, warm and large, curling around his waist. Thor doesn't turn him around, merely holds Loki still, the raven haired mans bird like chest fluttering.

"Calm down," Thor says and Loki can feel it, a deep echo that translates from Thor's chest to his back. It's calming, comforting. He stops, sucks in a deep breath and waits. When Thor turns him he can't help but search the other mans face, his eyes wide, still panicked.

"What?" He demands and frowns as the blonde smiles.

"Loki," Thor says, "it's Saturday."

Everything melts away in an instant, Loki visible slumps, his spine curling inward some as if he's been holding himself painfully straight.

"Thank God," Loki sighs, staring down at his feet, at the carpet and his bare legs. He feels his face heat and his fingers come to toy with the too-large shirt t-shirt he wears, definitely not his and practically bathed in the scent he woke up to.

"You took my clothes off," he mutters, horrified at the idea of Thor stripping him down. He feels Thor laugh and looks up, glaring.

"I did no such thing," Thor informs, "I provided you with the shirt you did the rest."

Loki's face heats, a blush tinting his cheeks a faint, pale pink.

"How embarrassing," he says, his legs feel too bare, naked in merely the large t-shirt and boxers. It's been a while since anybody has seen him like this, in fact it might be the only time. He feels Thor's gaze on him and finds the blondes face. "Must you stare?" He asks.

"Oh," Thor mutters, "sorry." He averts his gaze, a smile set on his face. Loki can't help but wonder why he's smiling.

"What are you smiling about?"

"The chinese food we ordered last night," Thor laughs, "I never picked it up."

Loki stares then allows himself a small grin.

"Did we really get that drunk?" He questions and Thor is laughing again, harder this time, Loki can feel it in the shaking of the mans broad shoulders.

"You got drunk," Thor informs through his giggling and Loki doesn't catch any of it, the words flying over his head.

"So what did you do with my clothes?"

"Oh, you dropped them over there," Thor says pointing, Loki scopes out the spot and there are his clothes, crumpled into a heap, discarded lazily on the floor beside the bed.

"If you wouldn't mind," he says, glancing at Thor and the man releases him. He gathers his clothes up in a bundle, sighing as he turns. "May I?" He asks, raising an eyebrow. Thor nods and passes Loki, shutting the bedroom door behind the deaf man. Loki takes his time in dressing, first he pulls his socks on, his pants, the shirt he had been wearing all until he is comfortably shielded by the layers he had discarded. Putting the t-shirt Thor had given him down, he glances around the room. It's plain, bare walls, white, the bed, however, looks thoroughly used, dipping down in the middle, the wall behind it appears a tad abused. Loki's cheek heat at the sight and he quickly ducks his head and exists.

Thor is in the kitchen, or so Loki finds. The blonde frying an egg, from his lips Loki can tell he's singing, that or having a conversation with himself. When Thor turns he catches sight of Loki.

"Oh," he says, his face betraying his emotions; disappointed. "I hope you aren't planning on leaving, I'm making breakfast."

Loki looks at the egg, sizzling in the pan. He offers a small, curt smile.

"I've over stayed my welcome," he murmurs, he watches Thor's face drop even further. "I have things Thor puts the pan down, stuff, I need to do and arrange."

Thor turns to face him completely. He shakes his head.

"You don't need, to go," he says, "it's a Saturday, you can manage without marking, or planning or whatever you teachers do"

"No," Loki cuts in, raising his hands in front of himself. "I can't, I've spent enough time doing this," he gestures wildly, "I don't know you and yet..." he trails off, voice thinning. "And yet I slept with you." He spits the word out, his voice echoing the shock he felt earlier.

"I know, but, Loki, please, just breakfast," Thor urges and takes a few steps closer, "it's just breakfast," he insists, he knows he's pushing, but he can't help it, he's used to people agreeing with him and now he's met this rock that is Loki.

"No," Loki interjects taking a weary step back, suddenly he feels trapped, like a fox cornered by hounds. "No, Thor, I can't, I"

"You can," Thor says, the egg in the pan begins to burn, "you just don't want to. Why?"

Loki imagines Thor's voice is loud right about now, maybe even angered.

"Why won't you stay, is it me?" He presses his hands to his chest. "Or is it because we happened to share a fucking bed?"

Loki brings a hand to his own mouth, he takes a deep breath, his eyes going wide. Thor seems to release his misstep. He stops, backs off and for the first time he sees Loki, sees a slender man, raven haired and fair trembling before him. He looks away and when he turns to speak, to say sorry for his idiocy, Loki is gone.

Loki doesn't know why he's crying as he hurriedly goes to his car. He sinks into the drivers seat, wiping at his eyes before driving away.

This is why he doesn't let people get close to him, he has a history with finding assholes. They always smile, act kind and the next thing Loki knows they are yelling in his face. He's thankful being deaf has some advantages, he can just shut his eyes and the world is silent, no lip reading, nothing.

He pulls into his driveway and heads to the door. Once inside he calms some. Thor isn't here, Thor will never be here. He sits on the couch, curling into a corner of cushions as he flips open his lessons. His eyes scan the words written on each page carefully, correcting and altering as he goes.

Work always brings him peace, numbers sometimes too, though he recalled when he was younger he had hated mathematics, now the endless possibilities in the subject seem so sure, comforting in their security. By the time he is satisfied with his work and sets it down he's already eaten lunch and it's nearly late afternoon. Thor hasn't come around. Loki makes dinner alone, watching vegetables and meat sizzle in the pan, pouring himself a glass of milk when he finishes. Dinner is a quiet affair, consisting of only his thoughts and the great tastes and smells of the food he's prepared. He eats slowly, savouring the spiced meal.

When he's done he puts the dishes in the sink and heads to his bedroom. He lets his clothing fall messily onto the floor before crawling into bed. When he next wakes to get a glass of water from the kitchen he passes the front door and sees a small piece of paper at it's base. He picks it up and studies it in the dark. It reads: _Please forgive me, I can't begin to explain why I said what I said or why I insisted on you staying. I'm deeply sorry for pressuring you. Thor._

He stares at it for a while before deciding it means nothing. Tearing it up, Loki drops the pieces into the garbage and returns to bed. He presses his face into the pillow and sighs loudly, he can still smell Thor on his skin.


End file.
